Eventually, even the most die-hard bachelor wants to settle down and fall in love. But the funny thing about love is that it rarely happens when you are ready for it, and sometimes love makes you wait. To make matters worse, most of us have no idea how to make it happen or to speed up the process. Love just seems to arrive one day, usually when you least expect it; that being said, there are ways to increase your chances and to make yourself more loveable. Not loveable in the cuddly bear kind of way, but loveable in the way that attracts potential partners. This article will cover several issues and will help you maximize your love quotient, so that you don't have to wait for fate, chance, or some other fleeting opportunity that may or may not pass you by.
Stage One – Are You Ready?
Most guys fall into one of the following categories:
Easy Lover
This guy falls in love with every single girl he meets. He dates them for a week, then is ready to move in with them or marry them. No one believes this guy’s sincerity, but you have to admire that easy commitment and assuredness he displays with each new lover.
The Nice Guy
Nice guys are…well, nice. Their female friends, parents, and buddies all try and set him up, but nothing seems to stick. Even the girls he dates realize what a great catch he is, but the love factor never seems to be in the cards for this nice guy.
Mr. Insincere
Insincere guys just want to get laid, and will say anything in order to accomplish that goal – including “I love you”, over and over again. While the scorecard looks good, the methodology hurts the insincere guy when it comes time to find a mate.
Hopeless or Closet Romantic
These guys tend to be shy, but you don’t always get that at first. They secretly watch romantic comedies, and wish they could meet the girl of their dreams. They often overpower a potential lover by saying too much too fast.
Cool Guy
Cool guys have a reputation to sustain amongst their friends, and part of that rep is being single. They usually have lots of short-term relationships, or a ‘steady/open’ relationship with an equally cool girl.
Unlucky Bastard
The unlucky guy is the one who let his dream girl get away, either by waiting to long to make his move or by not making the right moves. Everybody feels sorry for him, and he is often a funny, drunken feature at parties. In extreme cases, the unlucky bastard still lives at home well into his 30s.
Now the above list covers most guys who are still single, but there are always variations. The point being that there are things each of these types of guys can do to improve their love factor.
Quick Tips
Easy Lover
Prove it! If your latest girlfriend is really the one, then stick with it and go slower. Don’t move with in her right away or take off to Europe for a year of backpacking. Take her out, hang with your friends, let her experience your life and you hers, before you start professing your undying love. Get past those first 3 months of bliss to see if there is more the relationship than passion.
Mr. Insincere
You lack credibility, and the only way to gain it back is to change your modis operandi. Try dating, and avoid sex for the first few weeks. Get to know her. Remember - although sex is a cornerstone of any long-term relationship, you still have another 23.5 hours in the day you have to fill.
Hopeless or Closet Romantic
Your problem is you scare off your prey before you get close enough to take a shot! She may be just as desperate as you are, but give her chance to walk into the cage before you drop the gate. So here are some dont's: take her to meet your family in the first 90 days; ask her to move in or marry you for at least a year; tell her you love her for at least 6 months.
Cool Guy
Cool guys tend to learn the most important lesson too late – that the best ladies see right through your bullshit and won’t have anything to do with you. Yes, you may get sex, but love from a great partner is harder to come by. Want proof? Rent Grease and watch how John Travolta eventually scores with Olivia.
Unlucky Bastard
Okay. It’s time for you to move on, my friend. Whatever the reason you lost your one true love, you need to find option #2. New girls will sense your disappointment, and the way you compare them to your ex. Remember – falling in love will be different each time, so stop trying to recreate what you once had.
Love Tips For Everyone
Here are some general tips that every guy can use to increase their love quotient:
- Get a dog or a plant. Show her that you can nurture and love something other than yourself.
- Increase you stability. Ever since the dawn of time, females have looked for partners that demonstrate their ability to provide shelter and food.
- Personal appearance. Are you in shape? Is your wardrobe up to date? Do you bathe and shave on a regular basis?
- Be interesting! If you all can do is talk about sports and your job, then you are not going to be very interesting. Try reading, watching movies, and consider a hobby other than watching football.
- Female friends. Your female friends are a direct source to other females. Prove to them you are sincere, and they will help you meet some of their friends – the kind you want to marry.
Final Thoughts
Know what you want! Give up the “When Harry Met Sally” fantasy, and start looking for someone you can share your life with. Hollywood has ruined many people’s lives by making them think love in the real world is just like a romantic comedy. It rarely happens that way in real life, which is why they make movies about it. Once you understand the kind of person you want to be with, the better able you will be to go out there and find her.
